8 Things You Can Do To Support A Caregiver
Picture this: It’s 3 a.m. The house is silent except for the shallow, uneven breaths of the person in the next room. You’ve been awake for hours, soothing anxieties, adjusting oxygen tubes, or cleaning up another accident. Your body aches, your mind races, but sleep feels like a luxury you don’t deserve. Because tomorrow—like every tomorrow—you’ll do it all again. You’ll cancel plans, skip meals, and swallow your own pain. You’ll smile and say, “I’m fine,” even as your world narrows to hospital appointments and sleepless nights. You’ll love fiercely, but you’ll grieve quietly—for the life you once had, the future you’re afraid to imagine, and the parts of yourself that feel lost forever.
This is the reality for thousands of carers in Cornwall. They are the invisible heroes holding families together, often at the cost of their own health, dreams, and peace. They don’t wear capes, but they carry burdens heavier than most of us could bear. And while their love is boundless, their strength is not.
In the quietest corners of our Cornish communities, carers are crumbling. One in three neglects their own medical needs. Half report chronic depression. Many whisper, “I can’t do this anymore,” but keep going because there’s no one else. They don’t ask for praise. They rarely ask for help. But they’re drowning—and they need us to see them.
This isn’t just about kindness. It’s about justice. Carers save the nation billions each year, yet they’re left to suffer in silence. But what if we refused to let them? What if we showed up—not with platitudes, but with action?
Here’s how you can be the light they desperately need.
1. Offer Emotional Support: Listen and Validate
Carers often suppress their feelings to prioritise others. Simply being a non-judgmental listener can provide immense relief. Instead of offering advice, practice active listening: ask open-ended questions like, “How are you really doing?” Validate their emotions by acknowledging their struggles: “This sounds incredibly tough. You’re doing an amazing job.”
Offering a cup of tea and a listening ear is a simple way to show them support. But even if you can’t be there physically, regular check-ins matter. A weekly text or call shows you care, even if they can’t respond immediately.
Sometimes just letting caregivers know that they’re doing a great job and reminding them to take deep calm breaths can help with their anxiousness.
2. Offer Practical Help
Carers juggle countless tasks - cooking, cleaning, appointments, and medical care. Offer specific help instead of vague promises. Say, “Can I pick you up anything from the shop on Tuesday?” or “I’ll drop off a meal tonight.” Small acts, like walking their dog or mowing their lawn, free up time for rest.
Create a shared calendar where friends sign up for tasks. Laura, who cares for her autistic son, shares, “A neighbour of mine took over laundry duty. That one chore lifted so much stress.”
If you can, offer to hold down the fort while they enjoy a few hours of “me” time. Sometimes just a few hours away from their caring responsibilities can help a carer recharge.
3. Look For Signs Of Burnout
Carers are often the last to acknowledge when they’re struggling. They keep going, ignoring the signs of exhaustion until their body or mind forces them to stop.
Burnout can develop slowly or hit suddenly—and it’s dangerous. It might look like emotional numbness, constant fatigue, withdrawal from others, mood swings, forgetfulness, or even physical pain and illness. As someone close to a carer, you might see these signs before they do.
If you notice changes, talk with them. Ask how they’re really feeling. If the situation suits it, encourage them to rest, seek support, or speak to a professional. Your support at the right moment could be what stops things from becoming a crisis.
4. Help Them Access Support
Many carers don’t even realise they’re carers—they see what they do as simply being a parent, a spouse, a sibling, or a friend. Because of this, they often don’t know that support is available to them.
Encouraging a carer to explore available help can be a turning point. Share information about local carers’ services, financial aid, and wellbeing activities. Help them book a carer’s assessment, speak to their GP, or connect with support groups.
Even assisting with paperwork or making a call with them can make the process feel more manageable. If you're not sure where to start yourself, we offer free, confidential support and practical support for carers of all ages—and it could be just what they need.
5. Include Them in Social Life - Without Pressure
Loneliness is one of the most common struggles carers face. As friends move forward with their lives, carers can feel left behind or forgotten. They may want to join in socially, but feel they can’t commit or that others won’t understand.
Still, it’s vital to keep extending the invitation. Even if they decline, simply knowing they’re still included can help them feel connected. Adapt social plans to suit their reality. Plan to grab a morning coffee, drop by for a quick visit or bring a takeaway to their place. Stay in touch through messages, updates, or little check-ins.
Join them for a walk—physical activity boosts mood, and they can bring their loved one if possible. These small gestures help remind them they’re still part of something beyond their caring role.
6. Educate Yourself and Understand Their Situation
Learn about their loved one’s condition. Research symptoms, treatments, and caregiving tips. This shows empathy and equips you to offer relevant support. For instance, understanding that Alzheimer’s patients may sundown helps you suggest evening respite.
Share helpful resources, like articles or podcasts. Avoid unsolicited advice—ask, “Would you like me to look into [topic] for you?”
7. Celebrate and Appreciate Them
Carers rarely seek recognition, but that doesn’t mean they don’t need it. So often, their efforts go unnoticed. Telling a carer that you see what they’re doing—and that it matters—can restore a sense of value, hope, and dignity.
A simple thank you, a kind note, or a quiet word of encouragement can go a long way. Let them know that you admire their strength, their compassion, and the love they pour into what they do.
Celebrating small wins—like getting through a tough day or navigating a new diagnosis—can help them feel seen and appreciated in a world where they often feel invisible.
8. Be a Champion for Carers
Carers deserve recognition not only in our homes and hearts but also in our communities, workplaces, and government policies. You can help by raising awareness, supporting carer-friendly initiatives, and sharing their stories.
Carers often feel invisible in healthcare or social settings. Speak up for them: “Sarah has been managing John’s medications. Let’s ensure she’s included in care decisions.” Raise awareness by sharing carer stories on social media (with permission of course) or volunteering with advocacy groups.
Speak up about flexible working rights, mental health support, and the value of unpaid carers in society. Use your voice to amplify theirs. You might also choose to support local carer charities or volunteer your time to organisations that provide help. Every action, no matter how small, builds a more compassionate world for those who give so much.
Push for workplace policies supporting flexible hours or carer leave. Systemic change creates lasting impact.
